Mary Barber
Every year, I place flowers at the headstone of every family member I have lost.
The first tear comes to my eye when I drive to the cemetery and see that the American flag has already been set by our dedicated American Legion on my brother's gravesite. He served in the Korean War.
My next tear falls when I go to the Memorial Service at Hetty Green Park and think about a high school classmate, Fred Frappiea, who never came home from Vietnam. I am with grandchildren, but his life - the life he gave for our country - was so short-lived. Then, as I listen to the speeches by guest speakers, I get a lump in my throat.
And, as I reflect now on all who have served, I have a feeling of pride when I see my grandson in uniform, an infantryman in the Vermont Army National Guard. I pray for him always to be safe and well and have tremendous respect for his love of country and desire to serve. That, too, brings the final tear to my eye on Memorial Day.
I don't remember ever viewing the day as just a day for barbecues. I was raised to know that too many tears had fallen and that, out of respect and patriotism, it is a day to remember all of those who died.
Molly Stoner
Besides the larger cultural contexts, my family has its own Memorial Day ritual.
Sixteen years ago, I planted a garden in memory of my father, who had been an avid gardener and passed away the fall before. Each year, I take a picture of my boys (now ages 13 and 9) in the middle of the garden, “with Grandpa.”
Memorial Day allows that little ritual in our family - pausing to keep Dad present in our lives - much like the nation pauses to reaffirm its commitment to our freedoms and the soldiers who fight or fought for them.
Patricia Green
Memorial Day, 2014. How many are just taking it as a long weekend? Off to the beach, campgrounds, or backyards they go.
As they pop open their soda and beer cans and they chomp down on a burger or hot dog, let them remember what it's really about.
From 1861 through the present day, men and women have put on their uniforms, then hugged, kissed, and waved goodbye to their loved ones. As they turned, no one saw the teardrops going down their cheeks.
Some never returned. I think of my mother's cousin, Jack Richmond. I think of my Class of 1961 classmate, Jan Ulmer. I think of the little boy I would take to karate, Kyle Gilbert. They left their life's blood in World War II, Vietnam, and Iraq.
This is not a long weekend. It's the time to remember the supreme sacrifice that men and women made so we can enjoy those hot dogs and hamburgers.
Scott A. Nadeau
While growing up in Brattleboro (I don't live there now), there wasn't much military presence in town, so I thought of Memorial Day, like most teenagers and other young boys and girls did, as just another day off from school.
But in 1983, I experienced the importance of it firsthand from my future father-in-law.
It was during the height of the United States involvement in Latin America, and we were driving down Putney Road by the Town Common, when my father-in-law-to-be pulled off to the side of the road and got out of the car.
At first I did not know what he was doing, but I soon understood when he approached a group of people who were protesting America's involvement in Latin America by standing on top of the memorials that had been erected there to honor our local vets who had given the ultimate sacrifice and screamed at them to get down.
He explained to that group that they had every right to protest, but not by disrespecting those who gave them that right.
My father-in-law was a career-enlisted Marine who served two tours in Vietnam, so he understood firsthand what those sacrifices were. He taught me a valuable lesson that day on Memorial Day's true meaning, and I went on to serve six years of active duty in the Marine Corps myself.
Brandie E. Starr
Thank you to the families of all of those who laid their lives on the line so that we can be free to be doctors, artists, musicians, travelers, bankers, teachers, and more, and to find comfort in the religion of our choice.
I am sorry for the shameful way that your loved ones are treated by the services that are meant to be helpful when they return, or meant to help you when they do not.
If I had my way, your family would live in comfort with all that you need for the rest of your days.
I am not fond of our foreign policies that have brought us into war, but I am fond of people who follow their hearts with integrity and do what they believe is right - and those are the men and women our armed forces are full of.
Blessings to you on this solemn day. You are strong, amazing people, and I hope you are able to find some peace and happiness with your loved ones today, even while remembering those who have passed.